The Things This Country Does To Me

Be warned, the following contains some serious negativity.

So, I know I’ve been down on things here before, but today may very well win as the all-time most craptacular. I’ve realized, in nary a 24-hour period this country has made me a:

1) Sexist
2) Hypochondriac
3) Pessimist
4) Racist

And here’s why:

1) Women are retards. Now I realize that not ALL women are complete fucking idiots, but would all those who aren’t raise their hands to clearly identify themselves. I had a big long chat with Mandy on the phone today about us that mostly revolved around how much we mean to each other and care for each other. But when she said she could only be 99% sure she wouldn’t get back with her ex-boyfriend while she was at home in Guizhou I said I didn’t want to be sitting around like a chump being chaste for her waiting for that 1% to happen. I knew the 1% thing seemed like I was focusing in on it and blowing it out of proportion, but for some reason it just seemed odd and after an argument me asking about this caused we decided we’d cancel the boyfriend/girlfriend thing and just see what happens as it happens. A bit later on MSN she said that she changed her mind, she was getting back with her ex.

2) I’m going to die. I filled our bathroom bucket (we have no flush and have to dump a bucket of water into the toilet every time we use it) up today and when I took a look at it I realized the water was a wonderful shade of crimson. I don’t know what’s in our water but whatever it is it was certainly all over my pear after I washed it and while I was eating it. Something’s also wrong with my baby toe… it’s all red and gross.

3) My neck’s cramping keeping my eyes out for falling pianos. I went to Dalian for my class tonight. It was at one of the Future Schools there. After class I figured I’d take a bus down to the centre of Dalian, grab a bite and see if I could get the train back. I changed my mind at the bus stop and went back to spend an hour trying to arrange a shared taxi. It usually just takes a moment, but for some reason tonight proved exceptionally difficult explaining what I wanted to Chinese people. I gave up and went back to the bus stop and got the bus to the train station. Bought my ticket and with about an hour and a half to kill I decided to get some KFC and bitch in my journal. At the time laid out on my ticket I went back in the train station and realized there was an un-natural amount of people lounging around the place. Sure I had never been there that late, but it did seem excessive. When no one was boarding trains at said ticket-time, I decided to cut my losses with trains (4.5 kuai) and try again with a shared taxi. I woke Sherry, my manager, up and got her to call for me. She called back and said there were no shared taxis, and the reason the trains weren’t going was because there was a big accident.

4) Chinese people are assholes. Accepting my fate I got in an ill-bargined 80 RMB taxi headed home and counted my blessings that the day was nearly over. The 80 RMB was a bit much, but the guy was nice and I figured “what the hell.. I just want to get home.” Lost in my thoughts in the backseat I didn’t notice we had pulled off the highway into a cross-roads called Dalian Wan where the taxi driver explained he was just going to put me in a Jinzhou cab so he didn’t have to drive all the way there. Fine. So I get in the Jinzhou cab, my first cab driver gives the new driver some of the money I just gave him and speeds away. When the new driver shows no interest in leaving I ask why and he says we have to wait for 3 more people. It’s now 11:30 and there’s not a soul in sight. I again say, “Wei shen me?!?!” And he explains that my first cab driver only gave him 10 kuai and that’s just enough for a shared cab. He then kindly explained that if I gave him another 10 kuai he’d take me now. Realizing this day was just going to get worse and worse, I paid him and we left. I have no idea which one of them ripped me off but both did it with a smile.

Anyway, I got home and thankfully there was a cold beer in the fridge waiting for me… it was a nice way to wash down the day and the e-mail waiting for me from Mandy that explained that she slept with her ex-boyfriend last night. Refer to point #1.

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